Damn nature you scary! Candiru

BeerDMan Damn Nature You Scary, Shenanigans Leave a Comment

I would just like to say, fuck this little fucker right here. The candiru fish is one of the most feared freshwater animals in the world. These fish don’t look like much at first sight. It’s what they do to people that is the real stuff of nightmares.

What these little demon fish do is they will swim up into the urethra and lodge themselves in there with a series of spines that protrude out of its body. Yeah, that’s right, they will swim up your dick and poke you with their spines which will end up causing hemorrhaging.

Do not, I repeat DO NOT attempt to pull this guy out if its tail is still protruding from the tip. This will cause severe pain, you need to get yourself to a hospital right away so that you can get medical attention if you encounter one of these. Natural remedies and not treating can end in death for those unfortunate enough to encounter the Candiru.

It was thought that the fish may have been attracted to the urine of humans when they are in the water. This has since been debunked, but by no means is that an invitation to slip into the Amazon river and start wizzing. There is a documented case of an attack on Animal Planet where Silvio Barbossa was attacked. He recalls trying to grab the fish’s tail to prevent it from going in further. He saw the tail flapping around and then slip its way in before he was able to do anything.

Why does god hate us? There is no way this serves a purpose for this fish in nature. This is the most evil fucking thing a fish could do to a person. Luckily they are only native to the Amazon and the Orinoco. Hopefully your local watering hole isn’t the Amazon river, and enjoy your next swim!


  • BeerDman




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